The Valentine's Day Challenge
by Mark Sichel, LCSW
"Okay, February 14th is right around the corner. I've spent the last month consumed by my work, the Superbowl, and my post-holiday weight gain. How am I going to make Valentine's Day work for me and my gal?"
"I'm currently single and hate Valentine's Day. Should I try one of these programs I've seen on the Internet for finding a man in 30 days?"
"I'm swamped with work and kids. My husband complains that I pay no attention to him. How can I improve our relationship and make Valentine's Day memorable this year? Should I try some of the suggestions I've seen out there? Silk lingerie? Chocolate massage oil? Learn to kiss like a movie star? Gee, I don't know."
The Valentine's Day Challenge is for LOVERS WHO THINK. People with intelligence will not buy into gimmickry like "learning how to kiss like a movie star." Those who have succeeded in creating ENDURING LOVE AND PASSION know that it is not achieved in a week or a month and know that it requires effort, commitment, maturity, creativity and energy.
If you and your lover are in bad shape, or if you don't currently have a lover, you cannot fix the problem with gimmicks, half hearted efforts or gifts, no matter how costly and elaborate. Relationships take work. Intimacy takes work. A satisfying and enduring sex life requires energy, creativity, and an on-going commitment to being the best lover/spouse/partner/companion you can be.
In the age of the quick fix and instant gratification, this is not popular news. We want to follow the program and "have great sex in 30 days," or "find a man before February 14th." We want to fix our problems by paying attention to our lover for one day after making minimal efforts the rest of the year. Valentine's Day solutions we see in the media don't work, based on our combined 50 years of working with individuals and couples and helping them with issues of intimacy and relationships.
What is the Valentine's Day Challenge? Simply put, make every day of your life Valentine's Day. Work on communicating with your partner. Learn how to be more loving and affectionate. Pay attention to your mate EVERY day, and express positive, affectionate and loving feelings 365 days of the year. The Valentine's Day Challenge comes with a great prize for the winner: feeling great about yourself and your relationship and knowing that you put 100% effort into your love life 100% of the time. THERE CAN BE NO GREATER GIFT THAN ENDURING LOVE AND PASSION. Take the Valentine's Day Challenge and start planning your Valentine's Life...not just your Valentine's Day.
ME | US | FAMILY | WORK | WOMEN | MEN | ANXIETY | DEPRESSION | RECOVERY
HOME | ABOUT US | CONTACT | IN THE NEWS | PSYSTORE | REHAB
PSYCHOLOGIST | DRUG REHABSWINNERS CIRCLE
Copyright 2000, 2001 © Psybersquare, Inc.
Psybersquare Inc. does not provide professional psychiatric or psychological counseling, advice or services. The exercises, information, and journalistic content of psybersquare.com are for informational purposes only, and are in the nature of a self-help book or magazine article rather than a treatment service. psybersquare.com provides content exclusively for educational, informational, self-help and entertainment purposes only.